Have Never Been SO SINGLE…!!!!

I always thought that I was independent. I never needed any kind of emotional or moral support. I had my friends and family. There was no need for 'The One'. I was contended by the way my life was going. I always believed I would be able to manage without a relationship. I didn't want to get into the complications of one. I gravely doubted if my parents would ever approve of me being in a relationship. So, staying single was the best option I had. I decided to stick to the Just Friends tag and not go any further. It was all going smooth.

But eventually, all my friends entered into relationships. Their experiences made me feel out of place. The support, care, affection and Love which their respective relationships offered them made me long for one too. Soon, I could feel my inner resolve shaking. I wanted a relationship. Today, as I look back, it amazes me how much my attitude towards relationships has changed. Being Single is no longer something that I can do. I need to fill this empty space in my life, the sooner the better.

 There's got to be a 'meant to be' for me out there somewhere, someday I'm gonna find someone somehow, someway.

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Being Single isn't an easy task in today's world. Peer Pressure being the main culprit. Your friends may not force you into a relationship, but unknowingly, they make you crave for one. When you see the people around you talking about their relationships, the ups and downs involved, those sweet little arguments, those gifts and all the other stuff, you want to be a part of them too. 

But then that does not mean that you rush into a relationship, without considering the consequences. When it has to happen, it will happen. No matter what, you should never give in to your weakness and compromise with your self-respect. What is the point of entering into a relationship only to regret it later? Why not wait a little more? Maybe what you get is even better, or The Best!!

On the other side, being Single isn't that bad as well. You may feel out of place at times, but otherwise you are better off than your counterparts. While they are busy going through the emotional roller coaster of breakups and patch-ups, you sit back and enjoy being yourself. So, don't force love to happen, don't try to Make it happen, it never will. Just wait for the Perfect Moment, the Perfect Person, and the Perfect Love that will lead you to a Perfect Life.

I wanna fall in love… I wanna feel that rush… Which runs into my heart shaking up my soul, the feeling I've never felt before...

The Haunting Past

It was as if we were always meant to be together. When I met him, I realized how it feels to be with that special someone. He made me realize the worth of love. Life with him was perfect. We had a clear picture of our future right in front of our eyes. I started thinking that life was perfect. I was sure that our relationship was flawless. We decided that now that we were so sure of our relationship, there should be no secrets between us. This was a turning point in our relationship. The 'No Secrets' deal revealed certain things about his past which I was earlier unaware of.

This was not a very pleasant experience. He had a hell of a past. I never knew. I always thought that as long as our future was clear, knowing the past was of no use. It was only when things were presented in front of me, that I realized the actual situation. Although I never show it, his past haunts me till date. It makes me insecure. I became aware of the actual reason of his over-protective behavior. His past had shattered him, but at the same time it had hardened him from the inside. It is kind of hard to get these images from his past out of my mind. I still love him the way I used to. But there are times when I regret knowing about his past. 

We both deny it, but if we look close into each other’s eyes, we know our love is different. We know we have a future full of feelings that were left behind by us in our past.

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All of us have our own story, our own experiences and our own past. Some hold good records, while for others it was a new lesson to learn. For others, our past is just a story like that of a daily soap. There are a very few people who are actually affected by our past. They are the people who are with us in our present. Think of it in the other way, if you come to know about the not-so-likable past of your partner. What would be your reaction? What if this revelation intensely affects you at an emotional level? What if it makes you question the very existence of your relationship? 

It leaves you with not many options. Option one, you can ignore your partner's past and move on with the relationship. After all, if the present is satisfying, you can easily overlook the past. Option two, understand your partner's feelings and instead of holding him responsible, sympathize with them. It takes a strong emotional resolve to do so. Promise them that you will never let them go through the same ever again. The last and the most selfish option, sacrifice your present for the sake of your partner's past. Walk away and leave them alone to face the same emotional turmoil again. My personal advice to you is, choose from the first two. Completely ignore the last one. 

You never realize what kind of love you have, until you almost walk away from it and come back to find that it’s may be way too late.

I Miss The Old Him

 

  We had a fairy-tale beginning, almost. Things were perfect back then. There was love, there was commitment, and there was trust. Our relationship was nearly perfect in all means. He used to be concerned about me, gave importance to whatever I said. He made me feel like an essential part of his life. Things were great. And I only anticipated that they would get better with time. I overlooked the darker side.
  But as time passed, he seemed to have changed. He is now a very different version of what he earlier was. He is in no way similar to the guy that I fell for. He is no more the same person. His priorities seem to have changed as well. We argue more and talk less. On some days, I feel that I am being taken for granted. While on others, I wonder if he has lost interest in me. I cannot prevent these baseless thoughts from crowding my mind. This behavior of his makes me derive all sorts of conclusions about the future of our relationship. Whenever I try and bring up this topic, he casually ignores the topic and walks away. Is he bored? Is there nothing left in this relationship? Has the love faded away? 
  There are so many questions and not many answers. I would do all that it takes to set things right, provided he wants me to. I want to revive the lost love yet again. I wish to go back to those good old days when all was well. When all that mattered was US. 

As soon as you get too comfortable, that's when things fall apart.

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  Amidst all these young relationships, the concept of true, undying love has ceased to exist. There could be a multiple reasons to it. Are we too immature to know the true worth of relationships? Do we get bored of dating the same person? Are we yet to understand the concept of being with each other through thick and thin? Or probably, when we know we are loved by someone, we take that person for granted. On the other side of this change, lies the victim. The person who gives all that he/she has to revive the relationship. A person who has spent hours wondering what went wrong. 
  If you have even the tiniest of doubts about anything in young relationship, talk it out. For the suspense kills the other person. If you say you want to be with someone, stick to it. You may think your girl is over-reacting, but this isn't the actual picture. She can sense that the relationship is degrading, and she is concerned. She gave all her time and emotions to this commitment because she always thought that it would last. Explain your reasons to her, tell her what actually went wrong and you will see how she sets things right at once. Realize what you have before it slips away from your hands.

Stop pretending that things are more complicated than they are! You either love someone or you don’t, so stop hanging on to them.

Soul Sisters

 

  I always thought that I was one of a kind. There was no one like me. My habits, my behaviour and my way of handling things were unique. This made me feel out of place at times. I secretly wished that I had a twin sister. Someone who would know how things are for me. Someone who would understand why I am the way I am. Then I met her. She was just an acquaintance at first. As time passed, I got to know stuff about her. We shared our experiences, our opinions and our thoughts. It was amazing how we turned out to be so similar. We had a lot in common. 
  We had the same preferences, the same opinions regarding certain things. It was so good to finally meet someone like me. Although we weren't related, she was no less than a sister to me. We were soul sisters. The striking similarities between us caused me to give away this title to her. She is one person with whom I can share things that can't very shared by anyone else. This is because I know she sees things from a similar perspective. She knows how and why I judge certain things. I love her company. I adore her personality. Maybe because she's a lot like me. Or even better.

What's the good in news if you don’t have someone to share it with?

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  There lies some truth in the saying that Opposites Attract. But that does not mean that people run away from those who are similar to them. It is always a pleasure to find someone who is like you in many ways. Everyone needs such company. Everyone needs someone who knows how the world appears through their eyes. It was always good to have someone who has the same interests, the same way of life, and the same mentality as you. You can always discuss what you have in mind, because mostly you both will find yourself at the same path. There are certain things about you which no one may understand, but this person does. Probably because she's been through the same. Such a person will know what is to be said to put you in the right mood.
  You may not be related to this person actually, but you hold them close to your heart. They are a reflection of what you are or what you want to be. There are so many things that you can learn from them. So many things that you can teach them. Such a person has answers to all the unexplained questions that spring up in your mind. It is always a blessing to have someone who is so similar to you in your life.

A Soul Sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves and very much not ourselves - A special kind of double.

Nightmares of Losing You

He occupies such a prominent place in my life. Now that he has been with me since so long, I kind of cannot imagine life without him. I am extremely dependent on him. My life revolves around him. I love to be with him always. Together we are a perfect couple. The mere thought of having a future with him is overwhelming. I want things to be this way forever, and change only to get better with time. There are days when I make plans about our future, fantasies that take me to a heavenly place. He is my obsession.
But then there are these real bad days when all those negative thoughts creep into my mind. On such days, I cannot stop myself from thinking about the worst possible outcomes of this relationship. The clear image of the future begins to blur. I think of ways of making him stay if he ever decides to leave. The very thought of which scares me. Those negative images are somewhere buried deep down in my mind and crop up on such days, making them all the more miserable. I try my best to ignore them, but these thoughts are involuntary. Maybe they are God's own way of telling me how much I love him. 

My only nightmare is waking up in a world where you aren't mine.

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When in a relationship, people go through all sorts of mixed emotions. These emotions may be good or bad. The good ones are heavenly, but it is the negative ones that are difficult to tackle. There is a constant fear of any casual argument turning into a serious one. 'What if he gets bored and walks out of our relationship? What if he says that he doesn't want me anymore? What if he finds someone better?' These are a few of the many conclusions we derive. These are emotions which everyone in a relationship faces. Trust me; you aren't the only one out there.
These are all phases. Phases that are a part and parcel of relationships. Every relationship goes through bad times. Such situations are nothing but a trial period of your relationship. This involves insecurity, jealously, depression and other cynical emotions. The only cure is trust. You have to trust your relationship, trust your partner and most importantly, trust this love which holds you together. You should be sure of your feelings for him. If all this is done, other things would hardly be a problem then.

You will always be afraid to lose someone, afraid they may find someone better than you. You just can’t help that. It just happens as soon as you start to get too attached to someone. You don’t want them out of your life. Ever.

We are all CRAZY people!!

   

   Together, We are the Best. We are second to none. The crazy things we do, the stupid jokes we crack. Those senseless arguments; absolutely baseless mockeries, the code words, the messages, the groups, the hangouts, the parties. These act as the main ingredients of the special and unique recipe of friendship. I am glad to have such people in my life. Thanks to them, I can proudly say that right now, I am having the best time of my life.
These maniacs whom I proudly declare to be my friends are absolutely amazing people. I am a completely different person when they are around. They stood firm by me in not only my good days, but also on the bad ones. Their constant motivation and rarely useful advises carry me safely through my journey. They are my second family. Only people like them can make the most boring of lectures interesting. I treasure them. No matter where my life takes me, I'll try and be in touch with them, always.

   I may not be liked by many, but I know that I am loved, loved by this crazy bunch of people who make my life brighter.

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  They say that the bonds that one forms in high school/colleges go a long way. These are the people who stay with us throughout our life. We grow up along with them, sharing and learning from each other’s experiences. Competition, insecurity, fights, diplomacy often makes its way through such friendships. But eventually, we should fight our way out of them to save these friendships.
Ask a person who has no friends what it means to be alone. The feeling is almost suicidal. It kills you from the inside. On the other hand, the more friends you have, more the drama, more the fun and more the memories.
So, let go of grudges. Form new bonds. Because now is the time to meet amazing new people who will stay with you for the rest of your lives, making your bad days better.

People, who find crazy friends, find a treasure.

What it takes to Smile?

   Over the past few days, my attitude towards life has changed drastically. I smile less and frown more, I laugh less and crib more. But all this is not without reason. There are certain facts about life that I have recently accepted; it's just that I am having a tough time adjusting coping with them. People say I have changed to a grumbling person. But not even one of them bothered to ask the actual reasons. I was forced by circumstances to be the way I am now.
   There are certain truths about life that, after reaching a certain limit, just cannot be overlooked. I know that I am surrounded by diplomatic people who actually are backstabbers under the masks of innocence. I know I can't be at the top anymore. I know I cannot regain the things that I have lost in life. For certain things that went wrong, I know that I can do nothing but just sit back and regret. I just want to go back to the past and set things right, provided that I get a second chance. There are people whom I have hurt. There are people who have hurt me. There are people that I want in my life. There are people whom I want to kick out of my life. I know these aren't enough reasons to justify the new me. I am not like this always. Life does give me reasons to smile, a lot. But some days, I break. All the held back tears, mixed with frustration and grief, break free. On such days, I wonder what went wrong. I wonder why I did the things that I shouldn't have done and I wonder why I never did the things that I should have done.

Don't cry because it's Over, Smile because it Happened. 

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   Life, at times is unfair. You obviously get what you deserve, but the sad part is accepting that you may never have what you want. Not everyone is good at it. Not many people know how to fake a smile. Not many people out there are dual-faced. Sometimes, people are what they are. They may not smile too often, but that means that there is something bugging them. Smiling isn't as easy as it sounds. It's just not the lips that have to work; the heart is involved as well. Everybody has their own share of problems in life, but not many have the strength to tackle them with a positive attitude.
   People can fake happiness, but it is almost impossible to fake grief. One simply cannot pretend to break sad or depressed. The only solution is to overlook the negatives and focus on the positive things around us. Try to bring yourself to accept what you have. You may often think that you deserved better in life, but then what you currently have isn't that bad too. Laugh away your problems. Indulge yourself in what you love the most, explore yourself. Find out what you're meant for. The day you find out who you are, things will be brighter. Your vision will be much clearer. You'll know why things happened that way. And as far as other things are concerned, well, Ignorance is Bliss!

The most beautiful Smiles are the ones that struggle through the Tears.